Welcome to The Football Corner, the place where it appears Jason and Kylie Kelce have finally resolved their issue.
I’m not one to take credit for other people’s happiness, but I’d like everybody to thank me for the noticeable lack of that commercial this weekend. I don’t know about you all, but I barely saw it. It was bliss. It was joy. It was everything I’ve ever wanted from sports television. Not seeing that commercial made me levitate into the heavens. Knowing the Kelces have apparently sorted out their football-watching crisis, that nobody in that house will ever again yearn helpless for Dolphins-Vikings while Jason hopelessly scrambles to fit a fifth game into a quad box, made me weep with wonder.
Perhaps my intervention worked. Perhaps somebody at YouTube TV read Friday’s Weekend Watchlist, realized I had uncovered a logistical crisis hiding in plain sight and immediately dispatched several additional televisions to the Kelce residence. Maybe Jason finally accepted the fundamental truth I had been trying to explain for nearly two weeks: access to every football game is not the same thing as having enough screens to actually watch every football game. I’d like to imagine Kylie spent Sunday peacefully wandering through the living room now lined wall-to-wall with televisions while every one of her approximately 20,000 guests watched exactly what they wanted.
Or maybe they just stopped airing the commercial as much. Or, even worse, I just wasn’t paying attention.
Either way, I feel strangely empty. I had prepared myself for another weekend of combat. I was ready to continue this crusade until the bitter end, and to see that it might already be over is somewhat deflating. Because now the commercial appears to have retreated, leaving me with nothing but the football itself to think about, which is probably how this was supposed to work all along.
That said, let’s open the notebook.
